"The one chosen by my creator. I have been waiting for you. You will play a role in a great destiny. According to your social customs, I should provide you with my personal designation. Fi is the name I was given. I was created for a single purpose, long before the recorded memory of your people. I must aid you in fulfilling the great destiny that is your burden to carry."
i got a headache :/
google says im gonna die
why is google sending you death threats for having a headache
it got better
when he’s on his back, lay on his chest so that your body is slightly perpendicular to his
THEN HOOK HIS LEG AND PIN HIM FOR THE THREE-COUNT TO BECOME THE NEW WWE WORLD HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION
Cute fun nicknames for your significant other
- uh uh!
blaming your parents for your unattractive genetics
benefits of being friends with me
- shitty jokes whenever you ask for them
- shitty jokes whenever you don’t ask for them
i dont think my friends understand. when i say my room is messy i dont mean “cute” messy where i have a jacket hanging here and there i mean messy as in fuckin trash island where garbage citizens hold elections over who will become the next trash overlord it’s fuckin gross
all time favorite quote c:
shoulder shoulder shoulder shoulder
your favorite quote. is. shoulder. shoulder. shoulder. shoulder.
i love how there is no comments on this everyone just gets the reference
No. No, I don’t get the reference. 300 thousand people have reblogged this without a word, without so much as a tag, because apparently we all get the reference. I fucking don’t. This has passed by my dashboard hundreds of fucking times and nobody ever asks what the fuck it is.
I’m officially terming this post a conspiracy. 300000 people could not just know what this is. You’re all reblogging this to fit in, or because you know it messes with people, or because you’re the fucking Matrix. You’re the Matrix, aren’t you? You’re all a bunch of Mr Smiths living in a world of green code. Well fuck you all and fuck your stupid post. I’m off to save fucking Zion.
Dude it’s from spongebob
what’s the difference between a dirty bus stop and a lobster with breast implants ?
one’s a crusty bus station and one’s a busty crustacean#i’ve told this joke a million times and it NEVER fails